Last week when my progesterone was checked it was 29, so the Dr. decided I could reduce to one pill a day and then stop. He wanted to test it 24 hours after taking the last dose, so today I had the test. It came back at 22, and anything over 15 is considered normal, so that's good news. I would absolutely use the supplement as long as required to help have a healthy baby, but I'm so glad I can stop taking it. It's gross and messy.
On Monday I have an appointment with the midwives. I LOVE the midwives. When I had an abnormal pap a couple years ago, I had to have my cervix scraped for testing which was fairly unpleasant. One of them held my hand through it. I know I want them to attend my birth. They attend in a well known, respected hospital so I feel like if any emergency intervention is needed, it'll be readily available. My mom wants me to have the baby at the local hospital, but I'm just not feeling it. If anything big goes wrong here, they transport to the city. I think it's better to just start off there. Her concern is that when I go into labor, we'll have to travel about 40 minutes. I don't think that's a long time but I'm sure it'll feel different when the time comes.
I plan to have the baby without an epidural, which has received a lot criticism. The most common comment has been, "You'll change your mind." I want to carry copies of Ina May Gaskin's Spiritual Midwifery and Guide to Childbirth and put one of each in the hand of every woman who tells me this. I think that when we have our version of how something should be, we don't really want to give it up. Not only that, but we think others should share the same idea. So because the women I've had this conversation with have had epidurals see it as a normal part of birth, they expect me to as well. I have talked to a couple of women who had natural births, and they're more supportive of course. I intend to mentally prepare for a natural birth, while at the same time being open minded to the possibility of having to accept a different course (in the event of needing a C-Section).
I know I'm getting ahead of myself. I'm only 8 weeks and 1 day. So much could happen between now and then. I have friends and family praying for the baby and I am so thankful for them. Sometimes God's will is different than what we want though, and I can't put the possibility of bad news out of my mind. Too many people I know have gone through losses, and I know it could happen. I still want to think in terms of things going well, I want to get the house ready, and knit cute baby things. And I'm going to do those but I guess with a sense of caution. I don't really know how to explain it.
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