Pulling an Al Bundy

The baby gets pretty active in the afternoon/early evening, and I like to try to put my hand where she is so I can see if it can be felt from the outside yet. I usually end up looking like Al Bundy with a hand down the waistband of my pants when this happens. I don't think it'll be long before Nathan will be able to feel her. Sometimes when she flips I can feel her from the outside, but I can't catch it in time to tell him, or it happens when he isn't home.

Knowing and Moods

On Saturday, March 1st shortly after I was complaining about having to wait to know the sex of our baby, the elective ultrasound place called us to say they'd had a cancellation. We were able to get in around 12:45 and we found out we're having a girl! I love being able to use the right pronouns now, and I'm excited about being able to start knitting girly things.

Something I'm not excited about is reducing my anxiety medication. I know it's the safest route for her, but it is so hard. I'm down to 10mg instead of the 20, so it's not even like I'm completely off yet, and I feel different already. I have repeating thoughts, not bad ones, but I just get kind of stuck on something. I also feel kind of lonely and sad when I'm alone, and I didn't before. Nothing else has changed except my medication dose. Nathan has the same hours, we have the same routines, I still talk to my friends and go knit. But when I'm at home by myself like today (I had some stomach issues last night so stayed home today) I feel out of sorts. I'm on the medication for anxiety, not depression, but it still affects my mood I think. I guess it's just something to get used to, feeling different, and dealing with it. When I knit my mind really does slow down, and I've started using lavender oil to calm down when I feel anxious. I'm pretty sure I can find ways to cope, but I'm going to stay on the 10mg for another couple weeks before alternating 10mgs and biting those in half every other day for a while. I don't regret starting this medication because I have had such an easier time of things being on it, but I'm nervous about going back to how thing were before.

Waiting

It seems like a lot of pregnancy is waiting. I'm still waiting to feel definite movement, still waiting to know if it's a boy or a girl, waiting to sign up for birth classes, etc. I'm also waiting for Spring Break to get here because I need a break from work. It's been super stressful the past few days, and I'm starting to feel a little over it. I know I'll feel better and more focused after that week off, which is good because there's still a lot to do before school ends in May. That's about it. My appetite has been good. I really like The Laughing Cow Swiss cheese triangles on bread, Sweet Tarts jelly beans, La Croix peach/pear water, and I'm looking forward to the new Ben & Jerry's core ice cream. My belly is getting bigger and itches some so I try to remember to put cocoa butter on it before bed. Next weekend there's a big thrift sale, and a friend of mine is working it so she's on the lookout for a white crib. We have to start cleaning up the room we're going to use as the nursery. We're going to put down some laminate flooring in there at some point before he or she gets here, touch up some paint, paint the trim white, and move the adult furniture out and baby stuff in. There's a lot to be done!